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Baby for the Beast Page 8
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I barely notice.
Enzo hasn’t said a word, but he doesn’t need to. I can see it all on his face, written so plainly it might as well be a book for me to read.
“It’s yours,” I say.
“I know,” he says.
I didn’t even realize he stepped inside my house, but he’s standing just inches from me, hand against the wall above my head and body so close my breasts are pillowed between us. I close my eyes, drinking in his closeness. I wanted to believe I could do this all without him—or any man, for that matter. I managed vet school while working full-time as a waiter. I’ve done surgeries by myself when my tech was sick. I’ve saved pets who should’ve been beyond saving. So raising a kid by myself should be no problem. Right?
Maybe I could’ve spun that lie and let it stick if he hadn’t come back. If he wasn’t here.
He brings his face close to mine, lips nearly brushing mine.
In that moment, I can almost forgive everything. After all, what is there to really forgive? Forgive him for being born into a mafia family? For doing what it took to protect them? For kidnapping me only to turn around and save me from anyone else his father might’ve sent? No… He doesn’t owe me an apology for any of that. He owes me an apology for putting this baby in me, for knowing his world and mine never belonged tangled together and for still doing it anyway, for fucking me when he knew he was going to kidnap me.
He pulls back, leaving me with parted lips and short of breath. He paces in front of me, restless energy spilling over. I can see the turmoil in his features. He held himself back from kissing me and I can only guess at why.
“I need you to come back to the city with me,” he says. “It’s not safe for you here.”
“What?” I ask. “It was safe for me up until now, wasn’t it?”
“It was…” he says, hesitating.
“What?” I ask. The look on his face makes my skin feel cold. “Did your father find out I’m alive?”
“No, but when I told the guys where I was going, Nico apparently went behind my back and told my father where you are. Chase called me on my way over here and told me my father’s men were already getting orders to come bring you back in. For good, this time.
I take a step back from him, feeling the weight of his world crushing its way back into mine with pure, brute force. All the work I’ve done in slowly convincing myself I could live a normal life after my clash with the Lucianis comes crumbling down in an instant.
“Nico betrayed you?”
Enzo nods, and from the way his lips twitch, he’s still dealing with the surprise of it himself. “Nico always had his eyes on working his way up the food chain. He probably told my father you were alive as soon as I let you go, and knowing my father, he probably told him to wait. Figured I’d eventually slip up and lead them right to you. Fuck,” he says, running a hand through his hair and leaning against the wall across from me.
Without him standing so close, I feel like I can breathe again. Like I can think. But none of the thoughts popping into my head are good ones, and I already long to have his wonderfully distracting presence back with me.
“My baby…” The words slip from me like a loosely held weight, pressing beyond all my other thoughts and worries.
Enzo, who had been closing his eyes and trying to gather his thoughts, walks straight toward me now, hands clasping my cheeks as he stares into my eyes. “Our baby,” he says. “You’re not alone in this, sweetheart. You’re not going to have to do this on your own. You understand me? I’m here now.”
Each word punches into me, forcing a spot inside my heart where the sound of his voice and the meaning behind it settles in to stay, feeling like a warm fire that I’ll always be able to come back to, no matter how cold I may be. Even if he can’t possibly mean it all. How could he? The movies may not get everything right, but I know you can’t just walk away from the mafia.
“I want to accept that,” I say softly. “But—”
“May not want to go in there for a minute,” Jess says in an oddly high pitched voice. She winces, knitting her eyebrows together as she seems to remember that it’s not just me and her in the house right now. “You know, on second thought,” she says, “I’m going to just go back in there to die. Flush me when I’m done. Thanks.”
She fast-walks like she's trying to hold a ping-pong ball between her buttcheeks back into the bathroom and slams the door shut.
Enzo looks somewhere between amused and annoyed at the interruption. “Neela,” he says, after looking away from where Jess was. “We can talk about this later. You need to come with me. Now.”
There’s an edge of command in his voice that makes me feel like a captive all over again, but no matter his flaws, Enzo is the father of my child. I need to believe that counts for something. And… Last time he asked for my trust, he followed through.
What if he’s only lying about the danger so I’ll come with him? Maybe he saw I was pregnant and wanted to cage me again until he could claim the baby for his own and toss me aside. It’s a paranoid thought, and in truth, Enzo hasn’t given me enough reason to doubt him that much.
Still, I wish I had time to think this through properly. But I can feel the weight of his gaze like a mountain on my shoulders, compelling me to choose, and fast.
“I have a job here,” I say. I’ve already made my decision, but I want him to know the price I’ve paid each time he has inserted himself into my life. The first time, he left me with a baby and I had to leave my home, my job, and my friends. “I like my house. I even planted a freaking lemon tree in the back. Know why? I liked thinking the tree would be as old as my baby, and that someday we could make lemonade together from the tree, and I’d be able to say it was his tree.”
“His?” he asks, ignoring everything else I just said as he grips my forearm. “It’s a boy?”
“N-no. I mean. It might be. The doctor said I needed to wait until around twenty weeks before she’d check.”
He loosens his grip. “Listen,” he says in a firm voice. “I don’t care how it happens, but you’re getting in my car and you’re coming back to the city with me. I’ll throw you over my shoulder and carry you there if I have to. Carefully,” he adds, eying my stomach.
I chew my lip, looking toward the bathroom where Jess is probably replaying her embarrassment over and over again. “What about my sister?” I ask. “What’s to stop them from kidnapping her when they don’t find me?”
“What do you mean?” he asks. “As far as they know, your dad completely refused to cooperate.”
“Wait,” I say, holding up a hand. “My dad said he never heard a thing about any kidnapping until I told him myself. You talked to him?”
Enzo narrows his eyes, but nods. “I talked to him briefly. It was before I let you go.”
I frown, confused. “My dad said no one from your family ever made a demand out of him.”
“Because I didn’t make any demands,” Enzo says. I just apologized for the scare.
I watch him closely, not sure I completely believe him. I can feel the sense of urgency coming off him like waves, though, and I know he’s not in the mood to linger here and explain everything to me.
“Okay. Fine. I’ll come with you, but you’re bringing my sister too, until I know she’s safe.”
13
Enzo
Neela sits in my private rooms on the third floor of The Spot with a steaming cup of tea between her small hands. Her sister is taking a shower, and my crew should be arriving any minute. It’s around dinner time, but Neela doesn’t seem to be thinking of food yet.
“Chase and Luke will be here soon,” I say, rummaging through my cabinets for something to offer her. I eventually find a package of crackers, but she shakes her head. I set it down in front of her anyway. “Keeping you safe isn’t going to do any good if you starve yourself. Besides, you’re eating for two now.”
“I know that,” she says, surprising me with the sour tone of her voice.
“Listen to me,” I say, reaching to squeeze her hand. She lets me hold it, looking up at me with her large doe eyes that bring up every protective instinct in me. “I did what I said I would last time, didn’t I? I found a way to let you go, to start fresh. I’m going to keep you safe this time, too.”
“By locking me away in this fancy cage again?” she asks.
“What?” I ask, frowning. “You’re not my hostage, Neela.”
She looks startled by that. “So I could just get up and walk out of here and you’d let me?”
“I would, but I’d make sure I was with you and ideally some of my men were, too.”
She deflates a little. “I’m not a hostage then. Just a dog with a short leash.” She sighs and gives me a little squeeze on my hand. “I’m sorry. I know you’ve been good to me in your own way. It’s just kind of hard to get over… all the rest.”
I nod. I understand, even if I don’t like what she’s saying. Part of me imagined taking her back here and picking up where we left off. Though, to be honest, I’m not even sure where that was.
“Then maybe I can make it up to you,” I say, an idea occurring to me. “I’ll take you out tonight after the guys leave.”
“Is that a good idea? You said I shouldn’t be seen in public.”
“It just so happens that the fourth floor here would give you the perfect excuse to wear a mask.”
She raises an eyebrow, clearly dubious, but interested.
“It’s a private part of the club. For members who are interested in BDSM,” I say carefully, watching her expression for a reaction.
“So… you’re really into that?” she says shaking her head. “I’m sorry. Even if I felt like we were… there, together, I don’t think getting whipped and tied up would be good for the baby.”
I chuckle. “It sounds like you know about as much of BDSM as you do the mafia.”
She gives me a glare for that. One I probably deserve.
“It’s not necessarily about sex. It can be, obviously, but there’s nothing stopping us from spending some time together on the fourth floor tonight. There’s good food. Drinks. And if you’re really not into the whole scene, it’ll at least be amusing to watch what goes on.”
Neela chews her lip. She’s tempted. I can tell, but she’s debating it in her head, probably trying to figure out if I’m telling her the truth about not expecting sex.
I’m even a little surprised to realize that I don’t. Of course, if she enjoys the atmosphere and things develop in that direction, I doubt I’d be able to control the fire of desire that is roaring in me to devour her again. At the same time, I’d be happy to have an opportunity to prove to her I’m not the beast my reputation suggests, and I’d feel better knowing she wasn’t just trapped in these rooms until I can fix things.
“I’ll think about it,” she says finally.
I grin. “That’s all I ask.”
Luke and Chase arrive a little while later with my little brothers, and Jess watches them all walk in with a look of stunned silence. It’s almost humorous, because I can imagine how they must all seem to her. The gathering makes for an impressive sight. Luke has his shaved head and the star tattoos at his temples, with dark, arched eyebrows. Chase, as usual, looks like he would fit in a boy band more than in our crew, but he at least has a few tattoos to take some of the softness out of his look. Then there’s my brothers. Angelo is tall and imposing, broad and strong with hard eyes and a short beard. Gino wears a more amused expression, but shares the same build all the men in my family have. Angelo looks like he might punch you for trying to make a joke, and Gino looks like he’d crack a smile. Beyond that, my two brothers could almost pass for twins.
The notable absence is Niko, who probably knows I’d damn-near kill him if he showed his face here.
“We haven’t properly met,” Gino says, extending a hand to Neela. He flashes her an easy smile with twinkling eyes that make me want to backhand him. If I didn’t know my brother well enough to know he’d never try to work a girl of mine away from me, I’d probably do it, too. “I’m Gino,” he says.
“Nice to meet you,” Neela says a little sheepishly.
Angelo just flicks two fingers away from his temple toward her in a lazy salute. “Angelo,” he says deeply.
Luke and Chase introduce themselves to Jess, who still looks like a deer in the headlights.
Half an hour later, Gino and Angelo have finished cooking a pasta dish big enough for everyone.
“So,” Neela asks me as we sit down with our plates at the table while everyone else finds themselves a spot and falls into easy, casual conversation. “Your brothers can cook something like this and all you could manage were some stale crackers and a cup of tea?”
“The crackers were stale?” I ask.
She gives me a dry look.
I grin a little. “I make a mean peanut butter and jelly, and I can grill meat, but that’s about it. I guess the cooking gene skipped me over.”
“Maybe I’m spending my time with the wrong brother,” she jokes after taking a bite of the food.
“Careful,” I say. “You give me a reason to get competitive and you won’t stand a chance.”
She laughs. It’s a good sound, and even though I haven’t told her just how serious the rift in my family has grown because of all of this, it’s a good moment. A good night. I’m surrounded by the men who are still loyal to me. We’re eating good food. The city stands proud just outside the window and lights the river that runs through downtown. Meanwhile, Luke already has some sappy movie playing on the TV, but hardly anyone is paying attention to it.
I’m more than a little surprised to see Angelo sitting beside Jess, barely touching his food because he’s talking so much.
After dinner, everyone ends up gathered around the kitchen, driven together by an instinctive sense that we need to think of some sort of plan.
“Girls,” I say to Neela and her sister. “It might be best if you give us some time alone to talk about this.”
Jess starts to move toward the bedroom, but Neela just plants her fists on her hips. “We’re in this up to our necks already. You can at least keep us in the loop.”
Gino purses his lips in surprised approval of her spunk, and I can’t fault her reasoning, so I nod my ascent. “It’s worse than we thought,” I say.
The men already know what I’m talking about. When I called them to come for dinner, I gave them all a brief idea of what we were up against. Making sure everyone has a full belly before we talk business is one family tradition started by my father that I still consider sacred, but the time for casual talk is over.
“My father is using this as an excuse for a power grab. He’s drawing a line in the sand. My side, or his.”
“Shit,” says Angelo. “It’s a war, then.”
Luke nods. “Old fucks against the young guys.”
Chase is frowning. “You really think your own father would let it come to that?”
Gino makes a dismissive sound. “If it meant he could be the undisputed top shit again? Yeah. He’d gun us down in a heartbeat.”
“This is so cool,” says Jess, almost under her breath but unfortunately loud enough for everyone to hear.
Neela slaps her shoulder and gives her a stern look, to which Jess lowers her eyes and blushes a deep red.
“I don’t think it’s going to come to anyone getting gunned down,” I say. “He’d settle for a clean split, if it was an option. He could keep his men and we’d keep ours. There’s enough legal heat on his ass as it is without a bunch of dead bodies showing up on his doorstep.”
Chase nods. “I think you’re right.”
“Too bad,” Luke muses. “I’ve got a couple old scores I wouldn’t mind settling with a little bit of hot lead.”
“No,” I snap. “No one does shit without my permission. Unless one of his men has a fucking gun to your head, you don’t do shit. Understand? Even then, shoot the fucker in the knees. Anything lethal
is a last resort. If we push it too far, this will be a war. Right now it’s a stalemate, and he wants us to make the first wrong move, and we’re not going to do that.”
“You sure?” Angelo asks. He and Gino are some of the only people I’d allow to question me without bristling. “Could be our chance to break free of the old man’s chains. War could be just the thing we need.”
I shake my head, looking at Neela and then to her belly. “Too dangerous. We’re not going to let it come to that. Does everyone understand?”
They all nod.
No one says it, but they all know the truth. It came this far because I refuse to let anything happen to Neela. The rift that has been down the center of the Luciani family for years now finally split open. People might lose their lives over this, but I can’t let any of that stand in my way. The only thing that matters is protecting Neela and our baby. The only thing.
14
Neela
I look in the mirror at myself and bite my lip. Before knowing Enzo, I’d never had much occasion to think of myself as sexy. But when I see myself in a sleek black dress with silver, glittery trim, and with all but my mouth and chin covered by a masquerade mask, I can’t help imagining how he’d see me. I can already picture how his hungry eyes will roam my body, settling on my cleavage and my ass, where he’ll likely notice I’m wearing a thong from the lack of panty lines.
I’m not even wearing a bra. I still haven’t decided if I’m going to be that bold, but when I’m locked away in this club, it feels like I can step back into that other woman I was my first night with Enzo. The material of my dress is dark enough that it’s not scandalously obvious I’m braless, yet I still get butterflies when I think about walking out of my room like this.
I’m thankful we had a chance to talk to my dad this time, but Jess and I decided it would be best if he didn’t know the full truth, for now, at least. We told him we were going to have a girl’s week out of town with some of our girlfriends and that we should be gone about a week. The plan is to re-evaluate whether we should keep him in the dark if we’re still caught up in this after a week has gone by.